Isn't this the topic of discussion on every news channel … I have been thinking about giving my views on this topic right since Eliot Spitzer and Former Presidential Candidate John Edwards were in news. Also is it right to assume that only men cheat and not women and shouldn't the real question be "Why does one cheat?"
Is there even an answer to this question. I find this question very lame.
It is the basic tendency of humans to look for something exciting to do. You look for a new job when you have no growth in your current. You look for a new hobby if you are bored with your routine life. The same applies to marriage, I can feel a lot of eyebrows being raised with my petty comparison, but the truth is that you have to work on your marriage.
If marriage gets routine you look for something new, if you dont find it within your home you start looking outside. What happens thereafter totally depends, it depends on what you find. Some people find a new circle of friends to hang out with, some a new sport, some a new passion and some find a new friend whom they can associate with(or atleast in their current situation they think they do) and some dont wait for any of these they indulge in meaningless sex right away.
Is this the Right or Wrong way of thinking?? I am nobody to judge. Who is right or wrong?? .. again I am nobody to judge. If the relationship doesnot work out it is because of both and not one.
But the bottom line is someone you once loved deeply, somebody you once promised you would grow old with is devastated. The damage is soo bad that it can never be repaired. The trust can never be regained. So whatever you decide to do make sure you re-run the fun memories with your loved one and then decide what needs to be done.
But again to think of it ... how can a car run without gas. How can a marriage survive without love. Does it even make sense to be in such a relationship. I really dont have answers to these questions, thought i should provide it as a food of thought for those interested.
5 comments:
A very nice and innovative perspective on marriage and relationships...Though a more apt title for the write-up would be "Why does one cheat?" as it does not only talk about men cheating but I like the generic approach as it could be anyone in the relationship who could be cheating.
It's an interesting subject which always leaves many unanswered questions when put some thought on. There could be many reasons why one cheats. For some people things just don’t work when there are critical pieces missing in their relationship and hence they look elsewhere to fulfill those needs. But there are others who are selfish, self-centered, in spite of having everything are never satisfied, and hence when they see an opportunity to cheat they always take it. On the contrary, I don’t think there is any person who thinks they have it all. When it comes to a person's contentment there's always room for more. If this is the general mindset about relationships, then what's the point of entering one when we know that we cannot nurture it. I think people cheat because it’s easy to escape from things rather than to face it. I agree that its part of being human to always want more, but nothing can be lamer than using "I'm only human" excuse to cheat. We just have to know how to deal with it. No matter what the reasons are for cheating in the end everyone who is involved suffers. NO ONE IS PERFECT………………..
Thankyou for your feedback.
Sambhavi: You are right about the title, I did think about the title but everytime you read something about cheating it mostly about 'Why Men Cheat' .. i just decided to pick off from where they left.
Neetha: Just like you, I too could never arrive at a concrete answer to the question. I guess if the couple really wants the marriage to work they should notice the symptoms and work on it.
gotta do what you gotta do...you know what I'm saying'...some feelings are passionate, for others, there is a mastercard!
Good to know atleast one girl who thinks that its not always that men cheat. Women do cheat. But i don't think that anyone cheats just for the heck or because of some attraction. It means that something is a miss in the their current relationship. Neways good topic. We need bold people like yourself who can speak up. Waiting on your other bold topic discussion.
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